I'm not really sure how I got to this place. I speak to the development of my relationship with myself, as well as my relationships with others. It is so uncanny to me that I, the one who was such an "uncool" girl in junior high school and the beginning of high school, am now... who I am. I mean, I'm still weird and awkward, but being that I have accepted those attributes and others as valuable, others seem to follow suit and recognize my value as well.
And some are still clueless.
Like there is this one girl, woman? No, girl... there's this girl that I am mildly interested in who shall remain unnamed... I saw her at a club, but knew her previously through various interrelated relationships. Being who and how I am, I did not approach her on some flirtatious shit, smiling in her face, pressing my ass against her, hoping to solidify her interest in me... not my steelo, I'm no dick rider. I could sense that she might have been filled with her own essence, beginning to spill over... and I did nothing for her ego... I didn't speak to her with words, I spoke with my eyes... gestures... vibrations... I could sense that her ego may have been bruised, so I sent her an electronic love note... to which she responded with disrespect and egotism. (Which is why I am only mildly interested at this point.) I should have never fed the goblin. (More on the goblin in the future.) It will be interesting to see how she responds to me if/when I see her again... maybe at a certain party this Friday... Perhaps I'll dance with her this time. :-)
E.
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